Jaws VII

Mmm, local "delicacies"...

Stupid heredity

So those of you who know me may have noticed that I rarely leave home without a tissue - we all have our little idiosyncrasies I suppose. Anyway a visit to my Grandmother in Germany may have shed some light on how I came about this peculiar habit... check out this cabinet in her bathroom!

Amusing picture

Since I'm behind in my blog postings I thought I would take the easy way out and post another video. This was recorded at the same location as the previous video, and I found it to be tolerably amusing. Tolerably. What I like most about this is actually the fact that it's fun and easy to capture video with my cellphone, and quickly post it online.

I made the room smell like oranges

Came across this in a restroom in Prague... genius.

Third World Conditions?

And only one of those items is quickdrying. Shock and horror. Also fresh clean clothing.

The American Dream?

So Ang & I went out in Frankfurt this evening for a night of town biking (cause all the cool kids have guest bikes! mmm, deathtrap2...), beer & football. Oh and ice cream. can't forget the ice cream.

And so it begins

Actually I suppose it began several hours ago when I woke up at 3am to catch a bus to the airport. Stupid 3am. The bus was fairly decent though. I might make that a regular thing, even my for business travel. Anyway fast forward a few hours and I find myself sipping coffee in the Detroit Airport, killing time during my five hour layover before I can catch my flight to Frankfurt. Frankfurt Germany that is, because oh yeah, I'm going to Europe.

stupidbreadalwaysjellysidedown

We'll always have SuperCuts...

Calamity. I mean really terrible, horrendous news. I just found out that the girl who cuts my hair no longer works in Boulder. The girl who pulls my hair. The cute, punky girl who flirts with me. The girl who pulls my hair. The girl who runs her fingers through my hair telling me how much she likes it, and then pulls my hair. I mean if that isn’t true love then I don’t know what is. And now she’s gone, out of my life forever. Rumor has it she’s plying her trade in one of the neighboring “L” towns, but it might as well be Siberia.

Life Beyond the Freewheel?

Yesterday evening was beautiful – crisp & clear, perfect really. You know, a typical Boulder evening. I was returning from a Boulder Digital Arts Event, and it was so nice out that I decided to take the long way home. So there I am, biking along and having the time of my life when I’m struck with a terrible thought. I like to coast. I mean I really like to coast. Standing on my pedals, gliding along, picking my lines and shifting my weight to squeeze every last inch out of the few pedal strokes that I take… pure unadulterated bliss. What’s so terrible about coasting you say? Well it means I’m a fraud. I’m talking about fixies here – one gear, no freewheel – the wheel turns your legs turn. Instant bike cred deserving of respect and admiration. Any time I see a fixie its instant lust, such a beautiful yet simple machine. Biking at its purest perhaps. But with no freewheel, there’s no coasting! I have always operated under the assumption that one day I would pickup a fixed gear bike as a commuter - I've even placed a bid or two through Craigslist. Is it all in vain, do I have to face the facts and admit that fixed gears aren't for me? Is there life beyond the freewheel?

Shook me all night long

three cups of coffee.

half a bag of oreos.

five pieces of cold chicken.

one naked antioxidant juice smoothie.

invaluable proofing assistance provided by my wonderful friend emily.

a few more oreos (for good luck).

proposal complete : 5am

lesson learned : all nighters aren't as much fun when they involve work.

mmm, burning

Last night several friends and I attended a festival at a local Greek Orthodox church. A Greek festival.

We were compelled to attend the festival after hearing tales of flaming cheese. I mean seriously - cheese AND fire? What's not to love? Granted I have partaken in flaming cheese before and never really been satisfied... but I assumed this time would be different. Because did I mention the parts about fire and cheese? Sadly my hopes and dreams were once again dashed against the sharp cliffs of reality. The cheese just wasn't that good. Wasn't that good! How can you screw up such a wonderful pairing?!?! Maybe by using bad cheese and then covering it with the juice of a lemon? I do feel that the concept is sound, I'd just like to see it broadened in scope. Let's try this with Cheddar. Let's try this with Gouda. While we're at it maybe we could even find something besides lemon juice to put the fire out (more cheese perhaps).

Naturally when I say "let's try" what I really mean is "please make for Mike to try". Until then I'll stick to the Greekstyle. Because really - cheese AND fire.

Poetic Justice

Today I accidentally promised my friend Angela that I would update my blog. Stupid unfair promises, what if I can't think of anything witty to say. Duh, plagiarism. As if you didn't see that coming. Given the nature of my forced posting, it seemed only natural that I look to Angela's blog for source material - poetic justice or some such concept.

Actually I would have cross-posted this anyway - bikes, foreign intrigue, pretty girls, i mean what's not to love? Read on. That means follow the link below.

http://www.ski-epic.com/amsterdam_bicycles/

Awaken Film Project

For the past few weeks I’ve had the pleasure of working on an independent film being shot here in Boulder. Since film school I’ve only been involved in “corporate” projects, so I thought it would be nice to get work on something creative again. Who knew it would be just like having a real job! Waking up at 5:30 each morning, never really knowing when we’d wrap for the day, we even worked through weekends! Technically I suppose that I knew exactly what I was getting into and I was expecting the early morning crew calls – but I’m pretty sure my friends were still laughing at me.

Actually the schedule was extremely good for a film. The director had things nicely organized, and although our shooting schedule was aggressive it did move things along quickly (to the point where we actually finished shooting two days early). Working on the film was a great experience that allowed me to meet some extremely talented people – and I’m not just saying that on the off chance that they accidentally stumble across my blog. Good times.

A few days into the shoot I decided to bring my camera and assume the additional role of Still Photographer. Those of you who are interested can find a selection of photos from the shoot on my Picasa site here.

Enjoy.

Stupid Bike Lust

When I was in Chicago a few months back I had an opportunity to meet my friend Angela’s boyfriend Jacob. I actually spent quite a bit of time with him, as we often happened to be in the same place at the same time. Seemed like a pretty cool guy – friendly and amusing. Rumor has it he’s even a kick ass chef, and no one who speaks German cooks could be an evil man. Unfortunately he’s also an asshole… but maybe that’s just the jealousy talking. Because Jacob just sent me this – a picture of his new Bianchi Pista fixie, complete with flip-flop hub. Bastard.

Spanish Fly

This past Monday I did what I assume every self-respecting, self-employed person does when faced with a new work week – duck out early and go for a road ride. I was joined by my friend Jenny, who is currently training for a triathlon (stupid sprinters). Jenny is also self-employed, although judging by the quality and quantity of work coming out of her design firm these days I think it’s safe to say that she’s a bit more earnest in her endeavors (we all have our faults). Anyway we wrap up our fairly respectable thirty mile ride around 5pm. Like all good athletes in training we wish to replenish the nutrients our bodies used during the ride, so we point our bikes toward Illegal Pete’s in search of recovery beer & tortilla chips. Mmm, recovery beer.

Arriving at Illegal Pete’s we lock down our bikes and stake claim to a table on the patio bordering Pearl Street (a major pedestrian thoroughfare). Since we went directly from the ride to the bar, my friend and I are both attired in biking gear – specifically bike jerseys and lycra bike shorts. I thought nothing of this at the time; hell if I can wear bike shorts into a convenience store in backwoods northern Michigan where the very sight of lycra inspires banjo music straight out of Deliverance, wearing bike shorts in Boulder, Colorado certainly isn’t going to be an issue. So there we are hanging out eating chips and drinking recover beer, when I begin to notice a strange phenomenon. We’re getting checked out - constantly. I can’t recall the last time I received so many smiles, giggles, sideways glances, etc. After passing with a smile, one girl even went so far as to turn around for a second look… and then wave at me when our eyes met. I tend not to notice guys (pillars), but I’m sure Jenny must have been experiencing similar events (because really, duh). Could this be the holy grail I’ve been looking for? Obviously females attract our attention through the use of revealing clothing (or just by being alive really), do jerseys & lycra bike shorts have a similar effect on girls? For the sake of everyone out there I certainly hope not, but it does make you think.

Stupid uppity tomatoes

In an effort to placate my lethargic tenancies I recently used a pre-made, off-the-shelf marinara sauce in place of the from scratch version that I've been playing with as of late. A blander meal I can not recall. Why is the stuff we really want always so difficult to obtain? Stupid life lesson teaching pasta sauce.

Yup

We live here.

mmm, bacon

Son of a b*tch, who knew that the don’t cook bacon naked rule also applied to stir frying carrots? Seriously, wtf. On a related topic, my rice is mushy. If anyone knows the proper rice to water ratio for Thai Sweet Rice I’d love to know.

The Beatles Were Wrong

Happiness is not a warm gun, happiness is my new air conditioning unit. My stupid expensive what have I done it isn't even energy star approved but wow life is better all of a sudden air conditioning unit.

Oh and just an FYI - if anyone wants to watch me while I sleep now's your chance, my blinds don't quite close with the AC unit in place...

Moral Compass

A few weeks back Boulder experienced extremely heavy gusts, 60+ mph type stuff (I’m making the 60+ part up, but the mph is true). I remember this well because it all went down the night that I was scheduled to fly back to Boulder, and as a result I spent way too much time in O’Hare (on the plus side, I now know of a nice little beer kiosk located between two terminals – perfect for when the real bars are packed).

Anyway several beers later the wind dies down and I am able to catch a flight home. The next morning I step onto my patio, and discover that a planter box has blown into my garden. It’s a rather nice hanging planter box actually, and I assume someone must be missing it. Naturally I wish to do the right thing, so after a few days of laziness I place the planter in a high-traffic outdoor area near our mailboxes. This was weeks ago (maybe), and by now I feel it safe to assume that everyone in the surrounding condos has seen the planter box. The planter box that is still there. Now this is a pretty cool planter box, and if no one else wants it I might as well claim it for my own. Be my moral compass Internet, has it been long enough that I can make the planter my own?

One night in Bangkok and the world's your oyster

mlepix (10:38:17 AM): I need to hear stories

ifrdr1 (10:39:07 AM): hmm okay

ifrdr1 (10:39:19 AM): i've been meaning to blog about this, but it doesn't seem funny or story like

ifrdr1 (10:39:36 AM): so this past weekend 2 friends and i headed to telluride for the bluegrass festival

ifrdr1 (10:39:52 AM): festivaled it up friday night, then saturday we decided to play on the river (one friend had a 4 person inflatable boat, life jackets, etc.)

ifrdr1 (10:40:05 AM): lazy river stuff, we had a cooler of beer and wanted to combine mild rapids with beery goodness

ifrdr1 (10:40:40 AM): talked to a rafting company in town and they said the river was good class 1 and 2 stuff. 1 is floaty beer drinking, and 2 is rapidy but not really.

ifrdr1 (10:40:58 AM): so we put in, and for the next hour it's nonstop rapids. class 2 and class 3 stuff, no breaks and certainly no floaty beer drinking

ifrdr1 (10:41:11 AM): we’re bouncing off rocks, doing our best to steer

ifrdr1 (10:41:25 AM): no beer breaks at all - not even time to bail out the boat which was extremely full of water

ifrdr1 (10:41:43 AM): getting slapped in the face by waves, etc. I haven’t taken that kind of a beating since Thailand.

ifrdr1 (10:42:41 AM): eventually we manage to find a "calm" area on the side of the river, jump out and pull the boat out of the water (a long process since by now it was completely full of water). Except replace “find” with “get stuck in a tree near a shallow area”

ifrdr1 (10:43:00 AM): we were extremely thankful/lucky to "find" that spot

ifrdr1 (10:43:12 AM): cause it was sort of tip the boat scary, but in a fun safe way of course.

ifrdr1 (10:43:32 AM): anyway i had my cell phone along on this voyage, because call for help seems responsible.

ifrdr1 (10:43:47 AM): cell phone & wallet were packed inside of a ziplock bag - the one i keep it in when i bike

ifrdr1 (10:43:55 AM): then this ziplock was placed inside of the "dry bag"

ifrdr1 (10:44:12 AM): turns out the drybag doesn’t really stay all that dry when the entire boat fills up with water

ifrdr1 (10:44:53 AM): when we finally escaped the clutches of the river i had a chance to look in the drybag

ifrdr1 (10:44:58 AM): completely full of water

ifrdr1 (10:45:13 AM): the ziplock containing my phone and wallet? also full of water

ifrdr1 (10:45:33 AM): the camelback i brought with me for water & storage? submerged in a foot of water

mlepix (10:46:36 AM): hee hee I'm enjoying this

ifrdr1 (10:45:51 AM): the birkenstocks i had in the camelback? same story

ifrdr1 (10:46:05 AM): even my 1st aid kit got waterlogged

ifrdr1 (10:46:08 AM): crazy stuff

ifrdr1 (10:46:19 AM): then we walked back the 3ish miles to the car

ifrdr1 (10:46:44 AM): along the way ran into 4 kayakers all decked out in kayaky gear with whitewater kayaks

ifrdr1 (10:47:08 AM): they said the rapids were class 3, and were rather incredulous that we were rafting. I assume this is because they were in awe of our prowess, rather then amused by our stupidity

ifrdr1 (10:47:16 AM): they said if we went any further we would have really been in trouble

mlepix (11:01:17 AM): adventurous weekend!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

ifrdr1 (11:30:29 AM): okay blog has been composed, can u think of a good title?

mlepix (11:31:30 AM): hot and wet

mlepix (11:31:40 AM): unless you want this to be family friendly

ifrdr1 (11:31:24 AM): i do my best not to allow parents to see the blog

ifrdr1 (11:31:30 AM): but still that might be too suggestive for me

ifrdr1 (11:31:34 AM): i blush easily you know.

*The conversation above has been edited for content and my own amusement. Actual rafting may or may not have occurred.

Green & Bouldery

A few days ago I did my first ever grocery shopping trip via bike. This trip was made possible thanks to my fancy new courier bag, an item purchased primarily for work related purposes. Still when not in use for whatever it is that I do, this bag doubles nicely as a carryall for general use around town. I was able to stuff the bag with enough food to last several days. I rarely buy more then 3 days worth of food at a time anyway (as anyone who has seen my cabinets/fridge can attest) so this seems just about perfect. I imagine that I will still make the occasional trip via car to pickup larger items not conducive to being stuffed in a courier bag, but I see many shopping trips via bike in my future. I feel all green and Bouldery (plus not paying for gas appeals to my “thrifty” nature…).

Still, groceries? Food is good, but something about the whole event lacked excitement. Cue the liquor store. Turns out I can easily fit two six packs in the bag – and three would not have been out of the realm of possibility. Now I really feel Bouldery.

Apparently photography is thirsty work.

What I learned on my summer vacation

• According to my friend Namehere the Asian Beatle is very pretty, but it bites. And that’s bad. I’ve always been extremely fond of pretty things that bite, so this was quite the revelation for me.

• Sushi is good. Stupid sushi, now the cravings will start up again – and you know the night terrors won’t be far behind.

• Thai food kicks ass, and they do it right in Chicago.

• Repeat ↑, but use the words Chinese, Italian and Indian. Especially Indian.

• Apparently all I did was eat while I was in Chicago.

• Might as well add ice cream to the list as well.

• Photo Assignment: Chicago is cool.

• Zoos pictures are more fun with a telephoto lens…

• Then without…

• But that doesn’t mean all is lost.

• Family.

• Three Times! Makes for an amusing story, but seriously what the hell.

• Photoshop is awesome, and I know nothing about it. Or at least not enough about it. But now I can do this thing where stuff glows. Or doesn’t glow. Either way something definitely will or won’t happen when I use layers.

• Instead of keeping honey inside of a plastic bear, keep it inside of a glass container. Then if the honey crystallizes and has to be tossed in the microwave it will still taste like honey, instead of tasting like cancer.

And that’s what I learned on my summer vacation.

Hurty Goodness

Last weekend was the 7th annual Lyons Fat Tire Festival, hosted by Redstone Cyclery of Lyons Colorado. Two days of truly excellent mountain biking, epic death-march type stuff with over 4,000 feet of climbing. Awesome.

The event has been thoroughly recapped here and here so I won’t bore you (me) with a play by play description, but I wanted to touch on the highlights. Because really, this was pretty damn cool. So um, here are the take aways.

Biking is good. Climbing is hurty good, and descending is fast. Swoopy is fun. Girls are soft and pretty (technically that’s more of a life take away then a biking take away, but sometimes soft and pretty girls bike). Dale’s Pale Ale is the perfect post ride beverage. Biking is good.

That pretty much covers it I think – but if you didn’t get enough you can checkout my image gallery for pictures!

I'm a Dad!

The king is dead, long live the king

So a few weeks back I was sitting in the Nashville airport, waiting for my flight home after a meeting. I’ve got time to kill and for once I’m actually being productive. The laptop is out, I’m referring to papers spread on the chair next to me, I’m on and off the cell phone – if I didn’t know any better I’d say I was one of those guys who you know, worked. I was even dressed all prettylike because I had just come from a meeting. Crazy. Anyway there I am working furiously, when a woman approaches. It seemed that she had somehow locked her cell phone, and was hoping that I might be able to assist. Although unfamiliar with her phone I naturally said I would be glad to help, and put forth a couple of (tolerable at best) ideas. Before we could act the woman’s four year old daughter comes running up, “mommy, mommy, you do it like this”! The girl grabs the phone from her mother and after a flurry of keystrokes too fast for mortal eyes to detect, presents the now functioning phone to her mother. I’ve been technology gapped.

To Do...

I’m very fond of to do lists, they’re a great way of keeping life organized. Plus, once something’s written down I can forget it and let my brain move on to the next thing! Yesterday was errand day, so naturally I had my trusty to do list to guide me on my way. I was going about my business completing my errands when the second line on my list made me do a double-take… Knee pads & lube. Now really there’s a good explanation for this – I am getting ready for a trip to Moab to go mountain biking. The lube is for my bike chain, and the protective knee pads will help avoid knee surgery when I crash and go flying into a pile of rocks. Honest.

Stupid new expensive photomaker machine

http://www.flickr.com/photos/ifrdr/

Class

It’s good to be back in the Midwest. Oh and in case you’re wondering, yes that is a Lexus in the picture. Class.

What's black and white, and read all over?

Today I splattered a meat-based tomato sauce (homemade from scratch of course) all over my Moosewood cookbook. It’s going to taste delicious.

That's your answer for everything

epiphany in a blink and i’m knuckle deep in eggs and baking powder. buckets of flour and a thirst for vengeance. coffee strong enough to choke a dead horse. godlike, this power of creation : vanilla extract takes the edge off. top of the world ma, no one’s gonna stop us now. but the thing is, kings do fall – too late remembered. substitute ingenuity, but something’s off - calamity & downward spiraling. life makes the best choose-your-own-adventure of all, don’t you think? maple syrup fixes all.

Ten Punch

So it turns out that someone over at the BRC thinks I’m pretty f’n cool. I know this because when I got my pass in the mail the other day I saw that they had given me a nickname. I’m now Mike (ten punch) Lastnamehere. That’s right, ten punch – pretty masculine sounding, isn’t it. They must have dreamed it up while watching me climb some of the more impressive 5.9-s.

Oh and sorry for blocking out the personal info but I’ve already had my share of stalkers and although they make for interesting stories, I don’t really need more. Unless of course you’re young, female and cute (with photo) – then stalk away because my wish is your command and I’ll do whatever you say. Unit.

Ah, nostalgia

So this past Tuesday I flew to Cleveland, OH – smack dab in the heart of the Midwest. The cold, grey, drizzly Midwest. Sunshine? Ha! The Midwest scoffs at sunshine, that’s for West Coast vegetable eaters. Eternal bleakness punctuated by a cold & steady drip. drip. drip. Water torture at it’s finest – each drop more crafty then the last as it sneaks down your collar and attempts to steal your soul. Ah, nostalgia.

On a related note on the plane ride from Denver to Cleveland I begin the book Naked Lunch by William S. Burroughs. What the hell was I thinking. Before I finished first page I had come to the conclusion that I will never be cool enough to understand this book. Now I’m a huge fan of free association, but seriously, damn. How many drugs I would have to do before this thing makes sense? (Seriously, I’m curious.)